Project Runway premieres!

SPOILERS!

Yay! Summer TV has been vindicated with the premiere of "Project Runway." And the contestants seem to be more experienced than ever. (Olivia, if you're reading this, I was thinking of you while I watched!)

They introduced everyone and most seem to have real credentials ... meaning, they have worked for major designers or already have an established line and/or store.

Here's my homie, Blayne, from Washington. "I have a ridiculous obsession with tanning," he says. No kidding! He looks like a total Oompa Loompa and, at only 23, he has deep, awful wrinkles crow's feet already. Beef jerky! If they ever have a challenge to make a fantastic leather bag, he can save himself some time and have the model wear his face down the runway.

Also, his catch phrase seems to be adding "licious" on to the end of words. (Girlicious, etc.) Ugh. Sorry Washington, I think he's going to be a douche. But I hope I'm wrong.

There's a guy named Suede, who has blue mohawk and a vertical stripe as a soul patch. He's wearing capri jeans, a leather vest over a black tee and black, high top tennies. He also has tons of black rubber bangles up his arm, like I used to wear in high school.

Their first challenge is to make a garment out of things they find in the grocery store, which was the first challenge on season 1.

(Jerell's Tim Gunn impression is terrible, by the way.)

Jerry is bragging about how innovative he was and how everyone else sucked. Yet he's one of, like, six people who are using tablecloths/shower curtains as their main fabrics. Way to go, Smart Guy.

Man, his outfit is ugly as fuck, too. The ill-fitting, baggy coat is made from a white shower curtain, and he's got the model wearing dish gloves. It looks like the get-up Dexter wears when he's killing someone. (Michael Kors says, "The dress underneath looks like a HandiWipe gone wrong." Heidi Klum: "It's a bit hospital-plumber.")

Some of the outfits are pretty damn cool, though, I have to say. That's why I love this show!

Daniel made a sexpot cocktail dress out of blue plastic kegger cups.

Korto made a yellow kimono style dress out of a tablecloth, but then decorated the neckline beautifully with cut cherry tomatoes and kale.

And Kelli made an awesome dress out of vacuum cleaner bags that she dyed herself with coffee and ink; the bra cups were singed coffee filters; the waistband was decorated in gold thumb tacks that looked like metal studs. She closed the whole thing in back with hook and eyelet closures she made out of a spiral notebook.

Kelli wins, and totally deserves it!

Jerry's out. Hasn't he watched other reality shows? The second you start bragging about being the shit, it's the kiss of death.

On his exit interview, Jerry says: "I am a true designer. I make beautiful clothes."

Yeah, if your client is Norman Bates.